This past weekend, I attended Created for Care, which is a Christian weekend retreat north of Atlanta for foster and adoptive moms. It was good for me. I have really struggled the past few months with all the discouraging news coming out of Ethiopia regarding international adoption. There have been no referrals in months and we are so far down on the list, even if there were regular referrals occurring currently, we would likely be looking at years of waiting. Even though we've only been on the waiting list for Ethiopia since November, this month makes a year since we started the process. Combined with the time spent trying to adopt through foster care care first, we are approaching three years since we first got the call to adopt.
I chose a word as a theme for this year and it is: HOPE. I've been seeing that word a lot in my life, and I need it as a reminder when I start to doubt that adoption will ever happen for us. I see the word in scripture, hear it in songs, see it on T-shirts (including in Amharic-the official Ethiopian language). I had hoped to hear God speak to me this weekend about our adoption journey, and He did. He told me to "WAIT" and I was reassured that we are right where we should be. So for now I will continue to wait in hope.
One thing that has helped me is to stay busy. This has been easy really since we got on the waiting list with the holiday season, Brandon's birthday, my half marathon, our marriage conference, Micah's birthday, a trip to Disney World, and then my Created for Care (C4C) conference. Now that my schedule has cleared a little, I was wondering what I would do next. I quickly found my next "project" when I got home from C4C and had a flier about a neighborhood yard sale the end of this month. We have not participated in these in the past simply because I didn't have the motivation to go through all our stuff to get things together to sell. Now with unused items piling up and a need to save some serious cash, we will be having a yard sale March 29 starting at 7 am. The great thing is many others in our neighborhood are having yard sales that day, so it will hopefully attract a lot of people!
The fact is, we need to save approximately $20,000 more for our adoption (in addition to what we have already paid and have saved). The referral fee alone for 2 children which is due immediately upon accepting a referral is $15,200. There are other expenses, such as $2000 for foster care fees (care after referral before they can come home). We also need money for 2 trips to Ethiopia, which could be $10,000 or more depending on the price of airline tickets.
If anyone has anything they would like to donate for us to sell, please let me know! We really appreciate it! Mostly, please keep praying for our family and our adoption journey.
Monday, March 10, 2014
Tuesday, March 4, 2014
No change :(
We found out yesterday that for the second month in a row, our wait list number did not change. For families at the top of the list, this has actually been the case since August 2013. It is becoming more and more difficult to wait and trust, particularly in our case, since we are SO far down on the list. I did finally send off our immigration update to get official approval to change our status from 1-2 children and to change our age range up to age 8. February was a very busy month for us between the Forever Marriage Conference Brad and I planned to Micah's birthday and party and then a family trip to Disney World. I squeezed in mailing the immigration paperwork February 20 and was told it would arrive February 24. We'll see how long the wait is this time (we were told not near as long).
Our adoption agency, as well as the agency who represents us in Ethiopia remain hopeful that adoptions referrals will pick back up "soon," but we were told that we should expect to wait an additional 6-12 months for a referral. Considering the only wait time we were told was 15-18 months once we were on the list, and the list grew considerably before we completed paperwork, AND we have now changed our parameters to possibly include siblings, we have NO idea what our anticipated wait time should be.
Because of some changes that were made to ensure adoptions were ethical, a lot of children who were ready for referral have had to get entirely new sets of paperwork. In addition, the Minister of MOWCYA (basically the government agency that regulates adoptions in Ethiopia) has made statements implying she is personally anti-international adoption. While others are in support of adoption, she is somehow single-handedly holding things up by fighting with the regional governments over who has the final say in approving children to be referred for adoption. Apparently she has been making quite a few "controversial" statements about various topics lately, so we have been asked to pray that either her heart is softened towards the orphans and adoption or that she gets reassigned to a different position. In the meantime, the orphanages are under a great deal of stress and strain with more and more children who are not being referred for adoption as well as the task of gathering new paperwork on children who they believe are eligible for referral. I'm not sure how well the Ethiopian government supports the orphanages. I get the impression a lot of the supplies and resources come from outside agencies, such as relief organizations and adoption agencies.
Please do not "broadcast" this information as the adoption environment is so unstable right now, even well meaning posts can be viewed as negative by those who make decisions in Ethiopia. This is combined with recent allegations against IAG, an adoption agency that is being charged with multiple illegal and unethical adoption practices in Ethiopia, and creates a lot of doubt in the people of Ethiopia about the future of international adoptions there.
I am excited to be attending Created for Care (C4C) this weekend north of Atlanta. It is a Christian retreat for adoptive and foster mothers, and I have heard WONDERFUL things about it! It is a time for prayer and education, as well as a chance to connect with other women in similar circumstances. I don't personally know anyone going, but I know several women via Facebook who are attending, including several from our adoption agency who are waiting to adopt from Ethiopia. Adopting can feel very isolating as others who are not in that situation really cannot identify with all the emotions and stress and everything else that comes both before and after placement. I look forward to all I will learn and the women I will meet! I will try to update when I return from C4C.
Please keep praying that referrals will resume soon in Ethiopia, and the true orphans will be matched with waiting families!
Our adoption agency, as well as the agency who represents us in Ethiopia remain hopeful that adoptions referrals will pick back up "soon," but we were told that we should expect to wait an additional 6-12 months for a referral. Considering the only wait time we were told was 15-18 months once we were on the list, and the list grew considerably before we completed paperwork, AND we have now changed our parameters to possibly include siblings, we have NO idea what our anticipated wait time should be.
Because of some changes that were made to ensure adoptions were ethical, a lot of children who were ready for referral have had to get entirely new sets of paperwork. In addition, the Minister of MOWCYA (basically the government agency that regulates adoptions in Ethiopia) has made statements implying she is personally anti-international adoption. While others are in support of adoption, she is somehow single-handedly holding things up by fighting with the regional governments over who has the final say in approving children to be referred for adoption. Apparently she has been making quite a few "controversial" statements about various topics lately, so we have been asked to pray that either her heart is softened towards the orphans and adoption or that she gets reassigned to a different position. In the meantime, the orphanages are under a great deal of stress and strain with more and more children who are not being referred for adoption as well as the task of gathering new paperwork on children who they believe are eligible for referral. I'm not sure how well the Ethiopian government supports the orphanages. I get the impression a lot of the supplies and resources come from outside agencies, such as relief organizations and adoption agencies.
Please do not "broadcast" this information as the adoption environment is so unstable right now, even well meaning posts can be viewed as negative by those who make decisions in Ethiopia. This is combined with recent allegations against IAG, an adoption agency that is being charged with multiple illegal and unethical adoption practices in Ethiopia, and creates a lot of doubt in the people of Ethiopia about the future of international adoptions there.
I am excited to be attending Created for Care (C4C) this weekend north of Atlanta. It is a Christian retreat for adoptive and foster mothers, and I have heard WONDERFUL things about it! It is a time for prayer and education, as well as a chance to connect with other women in similar circumstances. I don't personally know anyone going, but I know several women via Facebook who are attending, including several from our adoption agency who are waiting to adopt from Ethiopia. Adopting can feel very isolating as others who are not in that situation really cannot identify with all the emotions and stress and everything else that comes both before and after placement. I look forward to all I will learn and the women I will meet! I will try to update when I return from C4C.
Please keep praying that referrals will resume soon in Ethiopia, and the true orphans will be matched with waiting families!
Thursday, January 30, 2014
The Latest
We will find out next Monday what our new wait list number is. We know our agency has had some waiting children referrals, but there were probably not any infant referrals (which is what most people ahead of us on the list are approved to get). We are not anticipating a big jump in our number, but we can always hope!
We did get the official word this month that our home study update (done in early December at our request) has been approved by our agency. Let me explain! Last summer, our agency started a "push" to encourage those adopting to consider waiting children. The orphanages are overloaded with children, but one reason people have to wait so long for a referral is that most want an infant/toddler. Most of the children in the orphanages fit into one or more of the following categories:medical issues (most often HIV+), older children, or part of a sibling group. When Brad and I began our adoption journey in foster care, we actually expected to adopt an older child. We were approved for up to 2 children and our age range was up to 16 years old (by our choice). We honestly felt a call to adopt and didn't want to "limit" our family to a child who was an ideal match simply because he or she was older. I actually found a 14 year old boy on the Alabama waiting child list who sounded like a good match for our family, but by the time we were far enough into the process to learn more about him, he was already matched with another family. Our biggest hesitation with a child from Ethiopia was the additional adjustments that would need to be made learning a new language and catching up in school. Because we both work, staying home for prolonged periods to deal with these adjustments is not an option for us currently.
When our agency started talking more about older children, I was able to read about the experiences of several families who had adopted older children. I was able to see how they had dealt with some of our concerns, such as the language barrier and education. By no means am I saying an older child will be "easier" because it most likely will not be. But I really felt a call to consider an older child. Brad and I began discussing and praying about it. This was all occurring while we waited for weeks for our immigration approval to come back. Unfortunately, our immigration approval specifically matched our home study at the time, which was approval for us to adopt 1 healthy child from Ethiopia aged 0-3 years. So when our immigration approval finally came back, we spoke with our case worker about mailing our dossier to be authenticated (sent to Ethiopia to put us on the waiting list). During the conversation she actually asked about our current child parameters and if we had considered making any changes. We told her what we'd been considering.
That discussion took place in October. The first week in December we had another meeting with our social worker to do an amendment to our home study. We discussed with her all the additional difficulties of bringing home 2 children versus 1 as well as other things to consider with adopting an older child. Our agency had become very cautious about approving families for multiple children due to the added difficulties that come with that. She wasn't able to scare us off (ha!), and we felt we had carefully considered this decision and how we would handle different scenarios. Mostly, we felt this was something God was calling us to open ourselves up to. So in January we got the official approval from our agency to allow us to adopt a sibling group of 2, with the first child being aged 0-3 years and the second child aged 0-8. After much consideration, we decided that it would be best to keep Brandon as our oldest child. We also felt like a younger school-aged child would be more reasonable for our family situation in terms of language barriers and schooling. Any referral we get must meet the first child criteria, meaning we could still get a referral for only one child aged 0-3 or we could get a referral for 2 children. We are excited to see what God has in store for us!
While referrals are currently REALLY slow, we have been reassured that adoptions are continuing in Ethiopia. Due to a need to ensure all adoptions are ethical, things are taking a lot longer right now. So while we could wait quite a while for a referral, like a couple years (I don't want to even think about longer than that), our new parameters also make us a little more unique and could result in a quicker referral. Basically, our referral timeline is even more unpredictable but in a good way. A second child will add to our adoption expenses, among those being a second referral fee and additional travel expenses.
We are now updating our I-600 with our new parameters, but this doesn't affect our wait list number. My game plan is to stay busy (so I don't think about the waiting) and enjoy my family. I alternate between letting it all go and leaving it in God's hands to my heart aching for my child(ren) who I don't have here with me. The busier I stay, the less I tend to think about our adoption. Isn't it sad that I have to try not to think about my own (unknown) children? This isn't about wanting more kids because it would have been easier for me to birth another child (even though one of us is currently sterile) than it is to adopt a child. Sometimes I think it may never happen and I try to convince myself to be content in just following God's call for my life. I'll just end this post by asking that you keep praying!
We did get the official word this month that our home study update (done in early December at our request) has been approved by our agency. Let me explain! Last summer, our agency started a "push" to encourage those adopting to consider waiting children. The orphanages are overloaded with children, but one reason people have to wait so long for a referral is that most want an infant/toddler. Most of the children in the orphanages fit into one or more of the following categories:medical issues (most often HIV+), older children, or part of a sibling group. When Brad and I began our adoption journey in foster care, we actually expected to adopt an older child. We were approved for up to 2 children and our age range was up to 16 years old (by our choice). We honestly felt a call to adopt and didn't want to "limit" our family to a child who was an ideal match simply because he or she was older. I actually found a 14 year old boy on the Alabama waiting child list who sounded like a good match for our family, but by the time we were far enough into the process to learn more about him, he was already matched with another family. Our biggest hesitation with a child from Ethiopia was the additional adjustments that would need to be made learning a new language and catching up in school. Because we both work, staying home for prolonged periods to deal with these adjustments is not an option for us currently.
When our agency started talking more about older children, I was able to read about the experiences of several families who had adopted older children. I was able to see how they had dealt with some of our concerns, such as the language barrier and education. By no means am I saying an older child will be "easier" because it most likely will not be. But I really felt a call to consider an older child. Brad and I began discussing and praying about it. This was all occurring while we waited for weeks for our immigration approval to come back. Unfortunately, our immigration approval specifically matched our home study at the time, which was approval for us to adopt 1 healthy child from Ethiopia aged 0-3 years. So when our immigration approval finally came back, we spoke with our case worker about mailing our dossier to be authenticated (sent to Ethiopia to put us on the waiting list). During the conversation she actually asked about our current child parameters and if we had considered making any changes. We told her what we'd been considering.
That discussion took place in October. The first week in December we had another meeting with our social worker to do an amendment to our home study. We discussed with her all the additional difficulties of bringing home 2 children versus 1 as well as other things to consider with adopting an older child. Our agency had become very cautious about approving families for multiple children due to the added difficulties that come with that. She wasn't able to scare us off (ha!), and we felt we had carefully considered this decision and how we would handle different scenarios. Mostly, we felt this was something God was calling us to open ourselves up to. So in January we got the official approval from our agency to allow us to adopt a sibling group of 2, with the first child being aged 0-3 years and the second child aged 0-8. After much consideration, we decided that it would be best to keep Brandon as our oldest child. We also felt like a younger school-aged child would be more reasonable for our family situation in terms of language barriers and schooling. Any referral we get must meet the first child criteria, meaning we could still get a referral for only one child aged 0-3 or we could get a referral for 2 children. We are excited to see what God has in store for us!
While referrals are currently REALLY slow, we have been reassured that adoptions are continuing in Ethiopia. Due to a need to ensure all adoptions are ethical, things are taking a lot longer right now. So while we could wait quite a while for a referral, like a couple years (I don't want to even think about longer than that), our new parameters also make us a little more unique and could result in a quicker referral. Basically, our referral timeline is even more unpredictable but in a good way. A second child will add to our adoption expenses, among those being a second referral fee and additional travel expenses.
We are now updating our I-600 with our new parameters, but this doesn't affect our wait list number. My game plan is to stay busy (so I don't think about the waiting) and enjoy my family. I alternate between letting it all go and leaving it in God's hands to my heart aching for my child(ren) who I don't have here with me. The busier I stay, the less I tend to think about our adoption. Isn't it sad that I have to try not to think about my own (unknown) children? This isn't about wanting more kids because it would have been easier for me to birth another child (even though one of us is currently sterile) than it is to adopt a child. Sometimes I think it may never happen and I try to convince myself to be content in just following God's call for my life. I'll just end this post by asking that you keep praying!
Tuesday, January 7, 2014
Melkam Gena! (Ethiopian Merry Christmas)
Today is Christmas in Ethiopia so we had a mini celebration. We very much Americanized it, but we did the best we could with our current resources.
The traditional meal consists of doro wat (spicy chicken stew) with injera (flat bread used to scoop up the wat). So our substitution was Brunswick stew with naan bread. We ate it with hot chocolate (in place of coffee).
For dessert, we had a traditional snack food in Ethiopia: popcorn!
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Soon I hope to try a recipe I found recently for Ethiopian spiced honey bread. It has ingredients I can purchase in our stores and I hear it is wonderful!
The traditional meal consists of doro wat (spicy chicken stew) with injera (flat bread used to scoop up the wat). So our substitution was Brunswick stew with naan bread. We ate it with hot chocolate (in place of coffee).
For dessert, we had a traditional snack food in Ethiopia: popcorn!
Gifts are not a big part of Christmas in Ethiopia and if given, are typically clothes. Lucky for me, the Disney shirts I ordered for our upcoming trip arrived the day before, so we presented them to the kids after dinner. We hope to eat at a traditional Ethiopian restaurant sometime this year (requiring a trip to either Nashville or Atlanta).
Soon I hope to try a recipe I found recently for Ethiopian spiced honey bread. It has ingredients I can purchase in our stores and I hear it is wonderful!
Merry Christmas (round 2)!
Sunday, January 5, 2014
New Year News
We are now almost a week into 2014. I have been reflecting on the past year and looking forward to the upcoming new one. I have been setting goals for myself, in many different areas including personal, spiritual, financial, relationship, etc. I have some things I would like to do/accomplish in the upcoming year and my biggest prayer would be that we would receive a referral. This folks, would be a miracle, but I hear God is in the business of making miracles so maybe He has one in store for us soon.
We got our monthly update from our agency. We knew there had been 3 referrals based on our agency's report. There are many factors that come into play but we were still a little disappointed when we were told our current number is:
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One major change that occurred during the past month is our referring agency is now restricting us from reporting any case-specific details about our adoption on any public forum. That includes our wait list number. I have made this blog private so I can still give more specific updates and to keep our prior posts in compliance with the new privacy policy. Please do NOT post any information revealed on this blog on Facebook!
There has been a lot of negative talk about international adoption in Ethiopia lately. If there is a horror story, they have heard it. This is a large part of why we have been asked to limit the information we give about our adoption process online. We have to help protect the future for adoptions in Ethiopia. The good news is that we have been told that the regional courts have finally, after several months of nothing, started approving children to be referred for adoption. Our agency is hopeful that they will be able to start issuing regular referrals again.
We are planning a mini celebration for Ethiopia's Christmas, which is January 7. We plan to simulate their traditional meal with Brunswick stew and naan bread. I'm sure it is a far cry from the real thing, but since we haven't been to an Ethiopian restaurant to try their food, I wouldn't know the difference. It is very difficult to get some of their spices and the flour used in their bread anyway. Brandon would love eating in Ethiopia because they do not use utensils! Their bread, called injera, is flat and used to scoop up the food for eating. Here is a little more information about Ethiopian Christmas:
http://www.whychristmas.com/cultures/ethiopia.shtml
We got our monthly update from our agency. We knew there had been 3 referrals based on our agency's report. There are many factors that come into play but we were still a little disappointed when we were told our current number is:
There has been a lot of negative talk about international adoption in Ethiopia lately. If there is a horror story, they have heard it. This is a large part of why we have been asked to limit the information we give about our adoption process online. We have to help protect the future for adoptions in Ethiopia. The good news is that we have been told that the regional courts have finally, after several months of nothing, started approving children to be referred for adoption. Our agency is hopeful that they will be able to start issuing regular referrals again.
We are planning a mini celebration for Ethiopia's Christmas, which is January 7. We plan to simulate their traditional meal with Brunswick stew and naan bread. I'm sure it is a far cry from the real thing, but since we haven't been to an Ethiopian restaurant to try their food, I wouldn't know the difference. It is very difficult to get some of their spices and the flour used in their bread anyway. Brandon would love eating in Ethiopia because they do not use utensils! Their bread, called injera, is flat and used to scoop up the food for eating. Here is a little more information about Ethiopian Christmas:
http://www.whychristmas.com/cultures/ethiopia.shtml
MERRY (ETHIOPIAN) CHRISTMAS!
Sunday, December 8, 2013
And the wait has begun. . .
Adoption seems like one big waiting game. I can already affirm the fact that a paper pregnancy is much harder! We have already been waiting to adopt longer than all three of my pregnancies combined!
30 months ago Brad and I recognized our mutual call to adopt (pursued initially through foster care)
12 months ago I started being pulled toward international adoption
9 months ago We began the process with our agency
15982 miles The distance our dossier travelled from our home to Addis Ababa, Ethiopia (with stops in Kentucky, Utah, and Washington, D.C)
11/11/13 The date our dossier arrived in Ethiopia and we officially got on the waiting list
159 Our first waiting list number (will be updated the 1st of each month)
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Now we simply WAIT. . . and prepare. . . spiritually, emotionally, financially, prayerfully. . . we educate ourselves for the next phase. We update our paperwork as it expires (can you believe we have already done that with one of our clearances?). The bulk of our adoption expenses are yet to come and when they do, the timeline will be much less flexible and closer together.
Some have asked how long our wait will be. The short answer is we don't know. There are currently 158 families ahead of us on the list. That means every time our agency gets a child or children who meet the criteria to be adopted, they start at the top of the list and locate the first family on the list who is a match (each family has their own criteria for a "match"). Many families never get to #1 on the list before they receive a referral. We were originally told the wait was estimated at 15-18 months once we were on the list, but that wait could be shorter or longer based on multiple factors. This fall some of the paperwork requirements in Ethiopia changed and that has resulted in the referral process to come to a standstill, but that will hopefully pick up soon.
Micah is still praying every night for her baby brother and/or sister. . . and when I say she prays nightly, I mean she NEVER forgets her sibling in Ethiopia but has forgotten to pray for her other family members quite frequently (much to her father's disdain). For 3 years old, she has been so patient. She has only asked once why it is taking so long and I've have asked that question myself more times than I can count.
Please continue to pray for our family and our patience!
30 months ago Brad and I recognized our mutual call to adopt (pursued initially through foster care)
12 months ago I started being pulled toward international adoption
9 months ago We began the process with our agency
15982 miles The distance our dossier travelled from our home to Addis Ababa, Ethiopia (with stops in Kentucky, Utah, and Washington, D.C)
11/11/13 The date our dossier arrived in Ethiopia and we officially got on the waiting list
159 Our first waiting list number (will be updated the 1st of each month)
.JPG)
Now we simply WAIT. . . and prepare. . . spiritually, emotionally, financially, prayerfully. . . we educate ourselves for the next phase. We update our paperwork as it expires (can you believe we have already done that with one of our clearances?). The bulk of our adoption expenses are yet to come and when they do, the timeline will be much less flexible and closer together.
Some have asked how long our wait will be. The short answer is we don't know. There are currently 158 families ahead of us on the list. That means every time our agency gets a child or children who meet the criteria to be adopted, they start at the top of the list and locate the first family on the list who is a match (each family has their own criteria for a "match"). Many families never get to #1 on the list before they receive a referral. We were originally told the wait was estimated at 15-18 months once we were on the list, but that wait could be shorter or longer based on multiple factors. This fall some of the paperwork requirements in Ethiopia changed and that has resulted in the referral process to come to a standstill, but that will hopefully pick up soon.
Micah is still praying every night for her baby brother and/or sister. . . and when I say she prays nightly, I mean she NEVER forgets her sibling in Ethiopia but has forgotten to pray for her other family members quite frequently (much to her father's disdain). For 3 years old, she has been so patient. She has only asked once why it is taking so long and I've have asked that question myself more times than I can count.
Please continue to pray for our family and our patience!
Friday, October 18, 2013
Trees Grow Slowly
Have you ever watched a tree grow? Initially, you'll probably think the same thing that I did. "Of course I haven't watched a tree grow! It's too slow!".
You would be wrong.
We've all watched a tree grow. The trick is that trees that are alive are always growing. They are just (obviously) growing too slowly for us perceive. Every day, that one tree you have in mind is somewhere between its last growth ring and adding another one. The space between them is constantly getting wider, bit by bit by bit.
Water is being pulled through the roots, up through the branches, out to the leaves, and back again. The leaves are doing their undeniably godly process of converting light (literal energy) and combining it with that nutrient-rich water, and causing each tree you see (every single day) into just a bit more wood, sap, buds, sprouts, flowers, or maybe even fruit. Yes, we can most easily see the tree's SIGNS of growth, but make no mistake, we see the ACTUAL growth. And this seems natural to us. We are never surprised when we look upon a tree that we haven't paid attention to in years and realize that it's put on 10 feet of height.
And so it is with (in my experience) tomato plants, my hair, may kids, and God's will.
Our family just received our long-awaited USCIS approval letter, which allows us to send our entire dossier across the world. We got a bit (understatement) frustrated. Anger, cynicism, and negativity pushed their way through into my feelings about this entire process of paperwork, approvals, regulations, and red tape. We had to WAIT; that was HARD. I had forgotten which process was really in being played out in our lives. The will of God was at work.
In the waiting (and especially after it was done) I have come to realize that God grows things very slowly, and He does it for a reason. As to what that reason is, I'm not sure now; I'm not meant to know now. I have been told this, though.
"The secret things belong to the LORD our God, but the things revealed belong to us and to our children forever...." Deuteronomy 29:29.
God taught Moses to give these words to the children of Israel, just before they entered the Promised Land. I'm sure they had plenty of questions as well. God gave them the answers they needed, the means they needed, and the grace they needed to get by. I must claim these words for our family and our process as well.
Our youngest, Micah, prays every night with our family and mentions 3 things each time she prays. These include her baby brother or sister, her mommy's garden, and the little tree in our front "yarden". One day, this process will be done. One day, we'll be walking hand in hand with the children God has given us from East to West, and I'll realize that the trees God planted in our hearts (and home) have indeed grown, just as Micah, and the rest of us, have prayed (and watched) since the beginning.
Hallelujah to the Grower of all good things! (1 Corinthians 3:7)
You would be wrong.
We've all watched a tree grow. The trick is that trees that are alive are always growing. They are just (obviously) growing too slowly for us perceive. Every day, that one tree you have in mind is somewhere between its last growth ring and adding another one. The space between them is constantly getting wider, bit by bit by bit.
Water is being pulled through the roots, up through the branches, out to the leaves, and back again. The leaves are doing their undeniably godly process of converting light (literal energy) and combining it with that nutrient-rich water, and causing each tree you see (every single day) into just a bit more wood, sap, buds, sprouts, flowers, or maybe even fruit. Yes, we can most easily see the tree's SIGNS of growth, but make no mistake, we see the ACTUAL growth. And this seems natural to us. We are never surprised when we look upon a tree that we haven't paid attention to in years and realize that it's put on 10 feet of height.
And so it is with (in my experience) tomato plants, my hair, may kids, and God's will.
Our family just received our long-awaited USCIS approval letter, which allows us to send our entire dossier across the world. We got a bit (understatement) frustrated. Anger, cynicism, and negativity pushed their way through into my feelings about this entire process of paperwork, approvals, regulations, and red tape. We had to WAIT; that was HARD. I had forgotten which process was really in being played out in our lives. The will of God was at work.
In the waiting (and especially after it was done) I have come to realize that God grows things very slowly, and He does it for a reason. As to what that reason is, I'm not sure now; I'm not meant to know now. I have been told this, though.
"The secret things belong to the LORD our God, but the things revealed belong to us and to our children forever...." Deuteronomy 29:29.
God taught Moses to give these words to the children of Israel, just before they entered the Promised Land. I'm sure they had plenty of questions as well. God gave them the answers they needed, the means they needed, and the grace they needed to get by. I must claim these words for our family and our process as well.
Our youngest, Micah, prays every night with our family and mentions 3 things each time she prays. These include her baby brother or sister, her mommy's garden, and the little tree in our front "yarden". One day, this process will be done. One day, we'll be walking hand in hand with the children God has given us from East to West, and I'll realize that the trees God planted in our hearts (and home) have indeed grown, just as Micah, and the rest of us, have prayed (and watched) since the beginning.
Hallelujah to the Grower of all good things! (1 Corinthians 3:7)
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